WWE’s Money in the Bank PPV emanated from TD Garden in Boston, Massachusetts. There was a lot of speculation as to who was going to win big in the two ladder matches. Many picked Seth Rollins, while the general consensus was that John Cena would win his 8,1934th WWE Championship.
The Kickoff show featured Daniel Bryan in his first appearance since he announced his injury. Michael Cole asks him about his recovery, and Bryan states that he doesn’t know when he’ll be back because his arm hasn’t fully recovered. The crowd loves Daniel Bryan still, and the “Yes” chants begin the second he comes out to the ring. Earlier, WWE took questions from the WWE Universe on Twitter for Daniel Bryan. The first question asks who he thinks will win tonight. His first plug was for John Cena, which got a chorus of boos. He then said Randy Orton, which got even louder boos. Finally, he smiled and said that his pick to win the championship is Roman Reigns. The second question was regarding how he feels about being stripped. He says that none of the Authority could beat him, so the only way they could get to him was by stripping him of the title.
Bo Dallas comes out after Bryan answers his second question. He addresses Daniel Bryan and says he’s been listening to him backstage, and says that “life isn’t about the destination, it’s about the journey.” And that all he has to do is Bo-Lieve! Bryan says he appreciates his concern, but it seems to him that Bo is acting like a “Bo-Ner.” The crowd then chants “Bo-Ner.” He says he speaks for everyone here when he tells him, “Bo, leave!” Bryan’s music plays and he Yeses himself off the stage.
During the roundtable, The Wyatt family interrupts with one of their jump scare videos. They are holding a sheep mask, and say that they are coming for the Uso’s.
The Pay-Per-View begins with The Uso’s vs The Wyatt Family. The Uso Brothers come out with new tights that make them look less like Mondo Gecko and more like backwards Power Rangers. The Wyatts entrance now features a child singing “He’s Got the Whole World in his Hands” as part of their theme. We’re just mere weeks away now from a kid coming out and MCing them down the aisle like Oscar from Men on a Mission.
The match itself is par for the course when it comes to Uso’s matches. There is a lot of high flying, high risk on the part of the brothers, and a lot of brutality from the Wyatts. However, Harper and Rowan actually show off a little Uso-like aerial action of their own. There is a sign in the crowd that says “Ravishing Rowan.” Toward the end of the match one of the Uso’s tries to roll up Luke Harper, as if this was ECW in 1998, and people won titles in that fashion. Harper and Rowan give one of the USO’s sort of a double Razor’s Edge and it looked pretty effective. Rowan goes to the top rope and is thwarted by the Uso’s. The twin Samoans then give Rowan a superplex from the top rope. Jimmy Uso goes to the top and splashes Rowan, followed by Jey Uso who delivers his own splash, ultimately getting the pin for the brothers, and they retain the tag team titles, all in the name of Total Divas.
Backstage, Dean Ambrose talks to Seth Rollins, saying he is going to rip him apart, climbing the ladder and taking the briefcase. His only question is does he take the briefcase or smash Rollins in the face with the ladder. “Case or face?” He asks. “Why not both?!” He ends by saying that his daddy, Triple H, is gonna be mad at him. All I want to know is how did Ambrose get ahold of Michael Jackson’s jacket from the “The Way You Make Me Feel” video?
The WWE Divas Championship match is next. The commentators mention the recent friction between Naomi and Cameron. The fight starts out with the action spilling out of the ring. Very aggressive match to start. Naomi does an outside Plancha, shades of her husband, Uso number 1 (or is it 2?). Naomi puts Paige in an elaborate submission hold, and it looks very punishing. So far this is a very good match, full of a lot of intense action from both competitors. Cameron is just standing on the outside enjoying herself. After an exciting series of movies, Naomi pops the crowd when she does a Shawn Michaels style Kip Up and gives Paige a Rear View then went for the pin, but Paige kicked out. I thought for sure she had the match won there. Cameron seems to smile whenever Naomi takes any kind of damage. Michael Cole says that Naomi has been glorious throughout the match. However, Paige wins with her “Paige Turner” leg sweep, after a really competitive exhibition. When it’s all over, Cameron goes to console her tag team partner after her loss.
The commentary team sends it over to the roundtable team. Why does Alex Riley look like actor David Faustino?
Damien Sandow comes out as Paul Revere. He mentions that the halfwits are coming, referring to Adam Rose and his Rosebuds. “If I had known Boston would end up like this, I would not have warned anybody of anything!” He says of the Boston crowd. The Adam Rose posse comes out, and I slipped into a coma. The stupid crowd begins to sing Adam Rose’s insipid theme song. What did Sandow do to deserve this punishment? I liked Rose better when he was Leo Kruger, and I hated Leo Kruger! Adam Rose has the dumbest gimmick in WWE since Hector Guerrero donned a turkey outfit and became Gobbledygooker. Adam Rose wins the match and his posse gets into the ring to dance, while I fit a noose for my neck.
John Stewart is in the audience, and Michael Cole has some “bad news” for #BNB fans, Wade Barrett injured himself and will not be participating in the MITB ladder match. Next, we see short interviews with MITB competitors.
Seth Rollins is the first to come out. His attire makes him look like he’s about to do battle against Magneto alongside the X-Men. Rob Van Dam, Jack Swagger, Dolph Ziggler then come out as well. Swagger’s shirt is amazing with the hand over the heart on the front. Kofi Kingston comes out, as does Dean Ambrose. Ambrose’s music sounds like the beginning of the Legion of Doom’s theme. I’d pay good money to hear Ambrose go “Oooooh, what a rush!”
The match begins. Spot fest, spot fest, 1-2-3! Ambrose and Rollins do a spot where they keep pulling each other off the ladder, and then the other gets on, only to get pulled off by the other. It was a very cartoonish spot. All it was missing was a crow standing in the corner cracking up, pointing and giving himself a knee slap.
Rob Van Dam and Rollins get into a fracas, the two having problems as of late. Van Dam gets his usual RVD chants, and he whips the youngster all over the ring. Rob may be a bit older, but he can still go high octane, something he refused to do during his TNA stint. It was because of his time there that I, and wrestling fans everywhere, assumed that he could no longer be the high risk acrobat that he once was. His Five Star Frog Splash is still awe inspiring, even though we’ve seen it a million times.
But the coolest spot of the match was Ambrose giving Rollins a superplex from the tallest ladder. It reminded me of the Briscoe Brothers’ ladder superplex onto two tables from last weekend’s ROH Best in the World 2014 Pay-Per-View.
During the match Ambrose is sent to the back because of a shoulder injury. I’ve seen this man get his head split open with a chainsaw, surely a hurt shoulder is nothing. Then, Kofi Kingston gives Seth Rollins a devastating backdrop from the top of the highest ladder, onto another ladder acting as a bridge between the ring ropes and the rungs of the tall ladder. For a minute I actually thought Kofi was going to win, but Ziggler puts a stop to that, and then gives Kofi a “Zig Zag” onto a ladder. Ouch.
Dolph, fighting the odds is finally all on his own, kicking away Jack Swagger. He reaches for the briefcase and Seth Rollins chairshots Ziggler off the ladder. Rollins grabs at the ladder and begins his slow climb. Suddenly, Ambrose comes back, shooting out of the back like a cannon, and chairshots Rollins to high hell, getting his sweet retribution on Rollins, pounding away on him with the chair, like a “government mule,” to quote Jim Ross.
Ambrose is at the top of the ladder and Kane’s music hits. Kane climbs the ladder and gets kicked off by Ambrose. Kane recovers and choke slams Ambrose, leaving the field wide open for Rollins. Kane sets up and gives Ambrose a Tombstone Piledriver.
Rollins returns and slowly climbs up the ladder after Kane has cleared the way. Kane even goes so far as to help balance the ladder for him. Rollins reaches up and grabs the briefcase. Your winner, and new MITB holder, Seth Rollins! Such a great match. The participants in the other ladder match had better bring their A game if they’re going to follow that. The Authority come out and congratulate Seth Rollins on his big win, giving him hugs and high fives.
Rybaxel come out for their match. The Dust Brothers come out. JBL comments that they give him the creeps. Stardust begins the match with Curtis Axel. The match seems like a drag, and the commentary team start talking about World Cup, and shilling for the WWE network. Ryback has improved a lot since his initial run, back when he was green as grass. However, the crowd still chants “Goldberg” at him. For a guy who started out so hot he sure has been on the decline when it comes to card position. Ryback once main evented pay-per-views. Now he is in a filler match with Curtis Axel as a partner against the Dust Brothers.
In the end, Stardust gets the win with a rollup. Curtis Axel doesn’t like the outcome so he begins to pound on Stardust. Goldust gets in the ring and he helps his brother get the upper hand. I love the combination of Dustin and Cody. Cody is very athletic and very inspiring. I’ve said for years that all he needs is a decent run for him to show off his skills, and become a star.
Next is an interview for the love triangle match. Fandango is the guest referee. His ref shirt has rhinestones on it. Rhinestones! You don’t understand, rhinestones! No, seriously, you really don’t understand, the man’s ref shirt has rhinestones!
Rusev and Lana come out. Lana talks about the American flag, and calls it a joke. I didn’t care to listen to the rest, except for when Rusev says that tonight he is going to crush Big E. Mr. Langston comes out waving ol’ glory. We see a box interview where Big E. does his Southern Baptist preacher promo. All he needed to do was wipe his brow with a handkerchief to complete the impression. For a second I thought he was going to introduce Randy Watson and Sexual Chocolate.
The match is slow and boring, as only a match between two power lifters can be. Big E. gives Rusev some nice offensive running moves, including a nice spear. He also gives Rusev a grand belly to belly slam. The best move is when he spears Rusev through the ropes and onto the floor. This is the first time we’ve seen him hurt and disoriented. Big E. pulls down the straps on his singlet and goes after his nemesis. However, Rusev gets the upper hand with his side kick, and then pumps himself up to lock in his camel clutch submission that he calls The Accolade. Big tries to power out of it, but fails. Rusev locks down on the move and Big E. is forced to tap out.
Fandango comes out with his rhinestone shirt. Summer Rae has improved her wrestling skills as of late. You can tell she actually takes this serious. The girl that at one time was in the Lingerie Football League has come a long way. That being said, there is no excuse for her to have that awful Taylor Swift sounding theme song. Leyla comes out in a mask that makes her look like the Lone Ranger, and her outfit looks like a bedazzled mess that she stole from the Price is Right dressing area. The match is filled with suggestive and gratuitous spots. The crowd is so bored they start chanting for CM Punk. Leyla jumps on top of Summer Rae and pins her. Her awful heel theme plays, and her and Fandango end up in a lip lock. The camera shows Summer in the ring crying, and 90% of the men in Boston immediately volunteered to console her.
After that bit of foolishness it was time for the main event. The WWE World Heavyweight Championship, up for grabs in an eight person ladder match. Triple H comes out for some reason, probably to sit and watch the match. All of the competitors come out and the match begins. A lot of good spots in this one. Cesaro and Alberto Del Rio play tug of war with a ladder. All the while Bray Wyatt comes in and then spears the ladder with both men holding it! Wow! Interesting that Roman Reigns is the only ex-member of The Shield that still wears his Shield attire. Did he win it in the divorce settlement?
At one point Roman and Sheamus give Kane a nice ladder sandwich. Michael Cole wonders if Kane is in the match to help The Authority or for himself. His question is answered when he sets up a ladder and picks Randy Orton up so he can climb the ladder. Randy is able to grab the belt holder that looks like the Assassin’s Creed logo, attached to a cable, and swings from it with Sheamus attached.
The mad scramble for the title continues. Kane is able to clear the ring. Instead of climbing the ladder he folds it up and sets it aside. Always the company man. I almost forgot Sheamus was the U.S. Champion, and then Michael Cole reminded me. The Authority just sits ringside watching the show. Sheamus delivers a Brogue Kick to Cena, saying “You can’t see me, fella!” Sheamus sets up the biggest ladder I’ve seen in some time. It looks like something Jeff Hardy would love. Kane grabs Sheamus by the foot and drags him out of the ring. By the time Sheamus gets the upper hand and shoves him into the steps Cesaro is back in the fracas. He builds a bridge like the one in the previous match and crosses it. Sheamus and Cesaro are at the top of the Hardy ladder slugging it out.
ADR drives the bridge ladder into the Hardy ladder. Roman Reigns is able to power the big ladder over with his amazing strength. It teeters there with two man fighting on top. Cena sets it back straight. Suddenly, everyone comes back into the match. Kane goes to work taking everyone out again. Sheamus has his hands on the belt but Orton and Kane pull him down. Orton and Kane clean house. Roman Reigns spears Kane out of nowhere, but Orton is able to knock him down with a ladder.
Orton tries to RKO Reigns, but Reigns is able to side step it into a Superman Punch! Roman flies all around the outside, spearing and kicking everyone, leaving a trail of bodies in his wake. Reigns and Cena have a stare down. The two men then go at each other with their fists. Cena sets Reigns up for an AA but Roman counters and gives him a spear, to a loud pop from the crowd.
Roman sets the Hardy ladder back up and climbs it. Randy Orton grabs his legs and unloads on him, giving him a wicked backbreaker off the ladder. Orton sets up the ladder to once again win the title, and become the face of the WWE again. However, Bray Wyatt takes him down and gives him a Sister Abigail. He climbs the ladder. ADR pulls him down to the dismay of the Boston crowd, finishing him off with a patented ADR kick. He climbs the ladder and has his hands on the championship. But Sheamus pulls him down and gives him a running Brogue Kick.
Sheamus climbs the ladder and Cesaro grabs him by the ankle and uppercuts him, giving him an Equalizer. He and Orton fight on the ladder, Orton RKOing the King of Swing. He then climbs the ladder for the win. But Reigns comes back and fights Orton. The slugfest is a nail biter. They finally climb down, and Randy Orton is busted open. We got juice!
Kane comes in and chokeslams Reigns off the ladder. Orton and Kane are left as the last men standing. John Cena steps in and clears both men. He then climbs the ladder, and for the 11,000th time, John Cena is the champion of the world. Bah!
All in all it was a fairly decent pay-per-view. I was glad to see two Divas matches, even though one of them was a joke. I felt bad for Kofi Kingston, the man simply cannot catch a break. However, I do like that they’re giving Mr. Rollins a shot by making him Mr. Money in the Bank. And while I admire Bray Wyatt as a wrestler and as a talker I simply do not get the hype of the Wyatt Family. Also, I’m convinced that Naomi is the female Shawn Michaels, with her athleticism and the tons of charisma that flows through her. She is going to be something special in the future, and her name will be up there along with Trish Stratus, Fabulous Moolah, and Alundra Blayze when it comes to women’s wrestling. Paige is too young and often comes off as sort of weak in her matches. She’ll get there, I have faith in her. John Cena winning the title again is a joke, but unlike previous title wins, I understand why they did it. Daniel Bryan is hurt, and guys like Reigns and Cesaro, who are two amazing talents, are not ready to carry that torch yet.